Why Hope Deferred Makes The Heart Sick

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Whether you are a believer or not, when we don't get something we are hoping for, it totally sucks. That can apply to almost any and every life scenario, but the wise words of Proverbs 13:12 are so true. I like the way the Message version puts it plainly:

Unrelenting disappointment leaves you heartsick,
but a sudden good break can turn life around.

Until recently, I never realized why our hearts get sick while hoping for something that we keep getting a "no" on. It feels so harsh and final when there is so much weight on something you really want. Something you are seeking for. Believing for. And are willing to give up anything to have. The reality is, that sometimes it's not a "no" as much as it is a "not yet." Neither are our favorite, and I have thrown my fair share of toddler tantrums being told to wait for something. Feeling as though I have suffered an injustice. The reality is, I have never been disappointed in the outcome of waiting or working hard toward something. Exercising my grit muscles. The ache is like the worst day 2 of leg day ever, but the reward is so worth it. 

It's easy to perceive a not yet as a painful no, but that's only a perception and not truth. Our perception is what makes our hearts sick. When we think everything and everyone is out to get us. That we never get what we want or are faithfully believing for. Sounds kind of whiny doesn't it? I have a headache thinking of those things coming out of a stomping little person, but that's exactly what we are doing. Our attitudes turn just as ugly as a toddler tantrum and it affects our well being. Time and time again studies are revealing the power of our thoughts. How they can increase negative or positive chemicals. As someone who has walked through extreme depression and anxiety disorders, I can truely say that my game changers were always in my perception. 

If you are feeling that unrelenting disappointment try to see it from another side. Go for a walk, and put yourself in a different environment while you process. We can only expect the same outcome if we do the same things. I have found many times that simply removing myself from routine opens my mind up to something new. Countless of epiphanies have occurred while walking a trail, sitting by a lake, or riding a bike somewhere. If you are really low and stuck, bring a positive person you know along with you. Being around people with the positive perspective you would like to have works. You absorb their aura and learn from their perspective. Those kinds of people can help shift your perspective to a more positive place. 

Hope is an important aspect of thriving. The more hope I am able to have, the more alive and content I feel. If you exercise my challenge, I would love to hear the outcome. Good or bad. Trusting that the hope you are seeking will be found. 

You are loved.

- Lexie